Posts Tagged ‘lover’

Core

 

I exposed my heart to you now what are you going to do..

I am vulnerable, soft and sweet a tender treat..

I shared my secrets; my deepest demons and my angels too..

but I have no regrets in telling you that I love you..

I now that you know that I am broken what will be my punishment..

will there be vengeance from you my darling nemesis?

I am torn in shreds and that I don’t regret, because I have spent all my rage..

my heart is out of it’s cage..

I am crushed like ripe grapes..

my heart is pulp, bloody red and raw..

but the ecstasy has transported me to deep euphoric harmony..

I am enraptured in the depths of ravishment that overpowers me..

how exquisite this emotion like a fine wine drizzled on my tongue..

I am undone; the art of ripping a heart apart..

to the core, to the essence of the center open and sore..

abraded, inflamed by a passion untamed,  that has bewitched me..

but my heart is free from rationality that imprisoned me..

I didn’t know I was ravenous and starving for lust..

so devastate me, plunder and dissenter to liberate me..

break me in pieces so beautifully to be enchanting and ravishing..

I surrender willingly..

Sensitive

 

Love is so painful and raw; no matter how down-to-earth I try to be I cannot help but be swept off my feet..

sensitive

My heart is tender and compassionate and so my passions run free towards sentimentalities..

sensitive

This sensuousness in me stimulates me to deliciousness and it brings me to my knees..

sensitive

So much pleasure brings so much pain but I cannot help but love the sweet punishment that it brings..

sensitive

Exposed, open and bare, ravished by a a hunger that leaves me famished I am engorged for more..

sensitive

There is no rational, no lucid or logical for I am sensual, captivating, eager and willing for the taking..

I am sensitive

I am deep, and awaiting penetrating of his piercing, sharp gaze into my soul he breaks though my defenses..

sensitive

My fragrance is the essence; carnal surrender as I give the core, the thrust towards the sweetness within..

sensitive

I am overwhelmed and overwhelming by the breathtaking way  he plunges in with resolute desire  to enslave..

sensitive

He descends and submerges in his urges as I shiver with pure concentrated pain that becomes my pleasure..

sensitive

And as I quiet, as I sink into the bliss he begins again to take with earnestness what is oh so juicy and tender..

sensitive

I made it all up

 

I made you what I needed you to be..

But it was all my own make-believe..

I told myself that you were like a living daydream or a falling star..

So I could get through another day..

I made it all up..

I made it all up..

I made you into my Prince Charming; so disarming my fears..

So that I could have this Never,Never Land inside my head..

I needed to lie to myself so I could get bye..

I didn’t want cry and cry..so I..

I made it all up..

I made it all up..

I lived in fancy place inside my head..

I made you my saving grace to save face..

I didn’t want to face the truth..

That world is cruel full of cruel ones like you..

I made it all up..

I made it all up..

I needed to spend time in this magic place just for while..

I enjoyed the magic spells that cast even though they didn’t last..

I just needed a rest from the real world..

But eventually reality found you and me..

I made it all up..

I made it all up..

I am so sorry

 

I am so sorry for the harsh words that I said in anger..

I am so sorry for the way I looked at you when I was mad..

It wasn’t even your fault but the words spit out like hot burning coals of fire..

I forgot myself and I fell into the deepest pit of my humanity.. so many mistakes I made, when I should of caught myself.. there is no excuse for hurting you..

And to see you crying because of the words I used with abandon and abuse..

I am so sorry..

I adore you .. and when I hurt you I hurt myself too.. you are the other half of my heart.. the reason that I breath.. please don’t leave..

The thought of loosing you because I lost my cool is more than I can bear.. I can’t spare one single day without you here..

Please ,, please forgive me… I am so sorry..

I humble myself.. I am on my knees.. begging you to please see I was just in pain and acting out that way was my release..

I am so sorry..

I hit the bottom now.. not knowing if you will forgive me baby..

I am so sorry..

How could I hurt such a warm and tender heart.. you’r so devoted and so caring.. I was hateful and so mean, please.. please forgive my brutality..

I am so sorry..

I am lucid now that the heat has cooled in me and I comprehend that I need to mend this rift between you and me..

I am so sorry..

I am so blessed to have you dear.. you are priceless and I cherish this love so much so that I can admit I was wrong..

I am so sorry..

Baby please forgive me

Until love finds away

 

I will do my very best; put on my pink dress until love finds away

I will love myself and everything all around until love finds away

I will make make beauty out of ugliness until love finds away

I will soar with the doves to heaven above until love finds away

I will be like a child and go outside and play until love finds away

I will adore all that I see with child like eyes until love finds way

I will be grateful for all that have until love finds away

I will seek health and happiness until love finds away

I am going to be just sweet little me until love finds away

I am putting on my make up and flowers in my hair until love finds away

I will be sweet, kind and gracious until love finds away

I will be all that love seeks so that love will find away

I am his oasis

 

I am his oasis.. as the world is a barren place.. he comes to me to fill his heart and slake his thirst. I am his nourishment and his sweet fruit.

He comes to me dry and parched many arrows run through his heart; as he has been to warring in a world full of cruelty he needs me.

I am his oasis

There is no need for his white trusty steed; he shakes his dented armor free as he comes to have his fill of me.

On my soft breast he rests his weary head; to cry brittle tears; as he has been strong for far to long but I judge his weakness not.

I am his oasis

His bitter tears of pain untold turn to sweetness within my folds and then within he takes what he needs from me.

My cup is full and it runneth over; he can take so much more of me forever more over and over.

I am his oasis

In me he sheaths his sword and plants his seed and then I grow for him the new strength he needs.

I am his oasis

The world promises him dreams of fortune and fate; but with his battlement it doth pay, but at a price of leaving him dry.

For fortune and fate cannot mandate the depth of a woman’s heart that heals his wary soul’s plight.

I am his oasis

I give to him soft rest and breast, sweet thighs that await him to penetrate them.

In the morn he brave again, is ready to raise again to the fight.. because..

I am his oasis

My love is the cup that fills his dry parched soul again, again, for I am his for the taking.

I am his oasis

His madness in me

 

I crave his pain.. his demons disease..

his madness in me

My flesh flushed in need..

his madness in me

My heart how it bleeds of fire..

his madness in me

I await him trembling with desire..

his madness in me

I want his punishing needs obsessive to please..

his madness in me

To break me until I am consumed of ..

his madness in me

His mistress of pleasure I will be ..

his madness in me

Sultry

 

 

 

 

But how I long for you not knowing you.. not having you..

I know not why..

My heart bleeds so..

Wings whisper pretty things.. words not quite formed in dreams half done..

But how I long for you the only one.. you leave me the lonely one..

I not know why..

It was in a voice I heard in a song of phrases olden times gone bye..

In rendering of passionate tears..so hot they burn inside my ears.. on the pillow they fall..

Pools of frustration between my thighs as my dreams do not manifest ..

His eyes looking into my soul long ago in other lifetimes ..

I know not why..

I look for him but I cannot find what hides in time..

Takes to long as my heart beats out of rhyme ..

Like starts in the sky up so very high I cannot reach for him or find him near..

I know not why..

And so I cry.

Longing for him…

I didn’t write the post below.. it’s a facebook post that I just copied and pasted. I just love it.. it speaks my heart and I am sure the heart of many women who have done their internal work.. it’s exactly how I feel. So many people shame women for wanting to have a relationship when they are single. And so many people who are in long term relationships or marriages have advice to give.. most of the time they don’t know what the fuck they are talking about.

I am happy to share this with you..I take no credit at all.. follow the links to find the page on facebook..

I hope I find him or he finds me..I hope you find the love that you desire too <3

 

So fucking beautiful

WANTING A MAN, BUT WILLING TO WAIT</p>
<p>I'm tired of feeling 'less than' because I desire a man in my life. I refuse to let someone tell me it's weak, needy, or pathetic to desire a partner.  </p>
<p>I don't want to raise my kids alone.  I don't want to sleep alone. I don't want to 'own' my orgasm or to be touched by my own hands more than I want to share the experience with a magnificent partner.</p>
<p>I want to crawl into bed after a long day and melt into my man. I want to breathe him in, feel his strong arms wrapped around me, touch his body and know I am safe. Not just physically safe because he's bigger and stronger then me, but emotionally safe too. </p>
<p>There is strength in a partnership. To feel supported, heard, acknowledged and valued. There is opportunity for growth when you are challenged and shown a different point of view. There's nothing wrong with wanting that. Why would admitting I want to share my experience of life make me any less of a woman?  If I'm guilty of anything, it's not feeling ok to acknowledge my truth for fear of appearing weak, needy or like I alone am not enough.</p>
<p>I've done my work. I've fallen in love with myself and I love myself first. I recognize my value and I think I'm pretty fantastic. I know my strengths and I'm working on my weaknesses. I don't feel like I need someone to complete me - because I'm already complete, but I DO want to share my life with someone. </p>
<p>Someone I can laugh with, cry with, dream with, create a beautiful life with, raise a family with, begin traditions that will last decades with, be physically and emotionally naked with. I want to feel excited in the morning when I roll over and see his face. I want to feel absolutely blessed each night when his lips meet mine in our goodnight kiss moments before we fall asleep.</p>
<p>I crave a man I trust completely. A man who's living his purpose and stands firm in his truth with intensity and courage.</p>
<p>I desire to love and be loved in a level I know exists but haven't experienced yet. I want to be desired, fucked, claimed, chosen, taken and experienced by a man who can't get enough of me. I want to fully surrender to a man I completely trust. I want to open all parts of me, specially those parts that have been damaged, hurt, closed off and hidden away for so long. </p>
<p>I don't want to have to protect my heart, I want to let go of my fear. I want to feel safe and find a man worthy of my heart. I want to be the woman who is worthy of his. </p>
<p>Am I willing to wait for a conscious man? Absolutely. Will I enjoy each day until he's in my life? Yes. But I'm going to allow myself to open up and say, ‘This is the kind of man I want and desire.'</p>
<p>Jenn ❤️</p>
<p>Join the conversation here:<br />
http://www.facebook.com/groups/1488651694707587

WANTING A MAN, BUT WILLING TO WAIT

I’m tired of feeling ‘less than’ because I desire a man in my life. I refuse to let someone tell me it’s weak, needy, or pathetic to desire a partner.

I don’t want to raise my kids alone. I don’t want to sleep alone. I don’t want to ‘own’ my orgasm or to be touched by my own hands more than I want to share the experience with a magnificent partner.

I want to crawl into bed after a long day and melt into my man. I want to breathe him in, feel his strong arms wrapped around me, touch his body and know I am safe. Not just physically safe because he’s bigger and stronger then me, but emotionally safe too.

There is strength in a partnership. To feel supported, heard, acknowledged and valued. There is opportunity for growth when you are challenged and shown a different point of view. There’s nothing wrong with wanting that. Why would admitting I want to share my experience of life make me any less of a woman? If I’m guilty of anything, it’s not feeling ok to acknowledge my truth for fear of appearing weak, needy or like I alone am not enough.

I’ve done my work. I’ve fallen in love with myself and I love myself first. I recognize my value and I think I’m pretty fantastic. I know my strengths and I’m working on my weaknesses. I don’t feel like I need someone to complete me – because I’m already complete, but I DO want to share my life with someone.

Someone I can laugh with, cry with, dream with, create a beautiful life with, raise a family with, begin traditions that will last decades with, be physically and emotionally naked with. I want to feel excited in the morning when I roll over and see his face. I want to feel absolutely blessed each night when his lips meet mine in our goodnight kiss moments before we fall asleep.

I crave a man I trust completely. A man who’s living his purpose and stands firm in his truth with intensity and courage.

I desire to love and be loved in a level I know exists but haven’t experienced yet. I want to be desired, fucked, claimed, chosen, taken and experienced by a man who can’t get enough of me. I want to fully surrender to a man I completely trust. I want to open all parts of me, specially those parts that have been damaged, hurt, closed off and hidden away for so long.

I don’t want to have to protect my heart, I want to let go of my fear. I want to feel safe and find a man worthy of my heart. I want to be the woman who is worthy of his.

Am I willing to wait for a conscious man? Absolutely. Will I enjoy each day until he’s in my life? Yes. But I’m going to allow myself to open up and say, ‘This is the kind of man I want and desire.’

Jenn 

Join the conversation here:
http://www.facebook.com/groups/1488651694707587

Why it is getting easier and easier for me to stay celibate

 

 

 

It’s getting easier because I am seeing what is out there in society today. Even at my gym I watch married people flirting ..attempting to carry on ( at the very least ) emotional affairs so that they don’t have to face the responsibility or take ownership of their own integrity in their relationships to their spouses. People want fluff, they don’t seem to want anything deep and meaningful. It seems both men and women don’t understand that the spark ( the Ideal) of the relationship cannot last forever..it usually only last a couple of years ..then the rose colored glasses dim..and you are faced with loving the real person not the ideal that you thought they were..and if you cannot do that..then have the integrity to leave the relationship before side-stepping into another one with someone else.. and then those who flirt with married people.. wtf are you doing? Have the integrity not to allow yourself to be played into someone else’s games.. the game of hide and seek from their own truth.. of not wanting to grow up and face their own problems.. that is what a real meaningful relationship teaches us.. others show us our strengths and weaknesses.. it isn’t meant to be easy .. sometimes it’s damn hell.. It is supposed to be both heaven and hell..as both the light and dark lives in each soul.

Now switching over to men.. this is what I see.. selfish men who don’t actually want a woman that is equal to them..they are macho not masculine.. macho in that they need a woman to fill a role and to complete an emptiness that is inside of them.. that emptiness is caused by men who need a woman to dumb herself down..so that she doesn’t challenge him into evolving into a full manhood. A dumb woman that knows her place in his life.. as a servant to his ego; doesn’t cause him to question his own selfish motives.. What I see are men intently and with greed, accumulating their own social status and toys will giving as little of themselves and their time, their emotions or intellect to a woman as is possible.. They don’t want to be truly intimate, to share their lives or resources..what they want is to get as much as they can from a woman while giving as little as possible.

I see men being boys..breaking a woman’s sense of her self worth by playing her against other women .. making her feel easily replaceable unless she gives herself up to him.. I will not give a guy like this my time, my energy or even a thought.. he isn’t worth it.. he is not worthy..

I see lots of men.. who say the are men, who profess to have courage..but when the the time comes to show courage by action..the use excuses or remain silent, or make themselves scarce.. What I am saying..is that I see boys fooling themselves into believing they are men. I see boys who are afraid, afraid to stand by one good woman, who are afraid to go into emotional depths, who are afraid to invest their hearts into the heart of one good woman.. Instead it is easier to date and sleep with girls who are not real women..because a real woman wouldn’t allow herself to be treated like second best..a second, third or forth place on his list of priorities.. a real woman would make sure she was his first priority, and the he was her’s.. but what I see are people who are settling ..to be treated without dignity or respect..

This makes it easier and easier for me to remain celibate.. I will not be treated with coldness or brutality, I will not be put last on his list, I will not allow selfishness and immaturity into my life.. and I will not show my children by bad example how to be treated with disrespect..

I respect myself .. I respect my kids.. and I respect the good man that is out there somewhere.. I respect him enough not to settle for anything less but him..if he manifests into my life or not.. I am not giving myself away to little men who are not worthy of a good woman. I will do for myself.

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