Posts Tagged ‘healthy body’

Celibate Sex

 

My sexy shopping spree was brought on by a bad dream I had last night.. I know this sounds funny but dreams are funny things..and the dreams that startle you awake rise directly from your subconscious. ( It’s a fact ) this dream did just that. In my dream I was with random no-name guy. Just some dumb, faceless guy in my life because I was sexually frustrated and lonely. I know a lot of women who make that mistake.. I hate that mistake and I have learned from that sorta mistake years back.. no-name, random guy is a waste of time and energy. In a spiritual sense giving your sexual energy away to someone who doesn’t vibrate at your level is spiritually damaging.. it leaves dark empty holes in your aura.. just like it leaves them in your heart..

With the moon being in Taurus and my Venus being in Taurus; even though I am an Aries. it was time to upgrade on my sex toys..and to treat myself to some sensuality..it was a sensual day ..because I was also reading tarot cards for women concerning questions about their sex lives and exploring their own sexuality..it was a day full of feminine sexuality. A nice break from all the male sexuality promoted all over social media.. feminine sexuality it so nurturing vs male sexuality that can be so aggressive.

The city I live in is very prudish… me writing about my own sexuality, spiritual sexuality or sacred sex..and women’s sexuality is taboo.. If I was ugly, unhappily married and had a PHD well that would be acceptable LOL..because I wouldn’t be sexually intimidating or threatening… silly I know..but this is a retirement community. I just found out today that Sears stopped carrying women’s thong panties because the seniors don’t like to see them in the store! Seriously! They don’t carry my favorite Jessica thong pantie anymore!

I knew the woman who was working at the Adult Store.. we got into a conversation about how and when Kelowna became so repressed, uptight and prudish. It was in the mid 1980s when they got rid of the Regatta, the Flinstone’s theme park and the roller rink.. they started to build condos for the seniors, or the rich that retired early.. everything became about wineries and golf.. The male employee called it ” The end of fun ” OMG he was so right.. Kelowna is so uptight. With attempting to network my book in a prejudiced networking community,  that acts like being prudish and sexually repressed is professional.. I have found the repression put on me to be stifling!  I have had to work very hard on my own internal dialog not to take on the sexual shaming that they put onto me by saying things like ” She is unprofessional and inappropriate ” because I write about sex..and I am topless in my book.. I have had to work really hard at maintaining my sexual energy through their projections..

The sexual energy is called SHAKTI ..it is the primal force that created and creates the UNIVERSE..basically it can be described as the essence of the GODDESS..so if a woman wants to keep this energy flowing..her creative juices..her life force.. her connection to the universe or her own Divinity..while she is without a partner she must self pleasure..often.. scientifically; through the lens of biology it keeps her healthy .. healthy mentally as well..as orgasms fight depression by flooding the body and brain with feel good hormones.

I also think that a woman who keeps her sexual spark alive while waiting for the right partner.. keeps bitterness at bay. A Goddess isn’t bitter or dried up.. she keeps her body and spirit connected through pleasure. My pleasure today was though chocolate, new toys, and shopping for new panties.. the erotic movie that I bought is erotica made for women by a woman.. it was pretty good..comparing it to porn made for male viewers.. the sex scenes were empowering vs degrading to women.. Goddess sexuality is empowering ..the Shakti energy is EMPOWERING…

Shakti (Sanskrit pronunciation: [ˈʃʌktɪ]) (Devanagariशक्ति; from Sanskrit shak, “to be able”), meaning “Power” or “empowerment,” is the primordial cosmic energy and represents the dynamic forces that are thought to move through the entire universe in Hinduism.[1] Shakti is the concept, or personification, of divine feminine creative power, sometimes referred to as ‘The Great Divine Mother’ in Hinduism. On the earthly plane, Shakti most actively manifests through female embodiment and creativity/fertility, though it is also present in males in its potential, unmanifest form.[2]

Not only is Shakti responsible for creation, it is also the agent of all change. Shakti is cosmic existence as well as liberation, its most significant form being the KundaliniShakti,[3] a mysterious psychospiritual force.[4] Shakti exists in a state of svātantrya, dependence on no one, being interdependent with the entire universe.

Realistic Weight Loss and Fitness

me 9 months pregnant with my son.. I was toxic and very bloated. But after loosing 4 pregnancies I was victorious when he was born..a true miracle.. one of my greatest challenges..

 

In point form

1. It’s a mental game. It’s all mental. You have to decide to do it and then take the actions to do it.

2. Educate yourself on health and nutrition.

3. KISS keep it simple stupid. You don’t need to purchase expensive supplements or equipment.

4. Create realistic goals. Rome wasn’t built in day.

5. Love and accept yourself first so that you can love and accept yourself more.

6. Weight loss and fitness are a journey, so enjoy the journey and transformation process.

7. The most important.. do it for you; do it for yourself first and foremost. This will give you the power to follow through.

8. Create more fitness goals once you have reached a peak..keep spreading your wings.

Everyone is looking for a quick fix and instant gratification.. sorta like going to the fridge and getting your favorite treat.. real lasting weight loss takes time. Starvation diets don’t work because you can only starve yourself for so long. Not feeding your body slows down your metabolic rate..or the amount of calories you burn while resting. Your body is furnace; to keep it burning at a higher rate you need to eat 6 small high protein meals a day. You need to sweat to burn calories.. you need to sweat to cleanse your body. Scientifically speaking NOTHING works better at cleansing the body than a clean organic diet.. with lots of filtered water.. and a good solid half hour sweat at least 5x a week ( then you can work your way up ). Nothing else is needed to cleanse your body..to help your body burn calories and fight ageing. Nothing on the market can do for you what Mother Nature can do for you..or the natural nature of your own human biology. We were not meant to sit on our asses in front of screens all day and eat processed foods. It is just that simple.. stop eating garbage if you don’t want to feel like garbage..increase your energy by expending energy.. this creates more energy over all..

THE MENTAL GAME  - it’s about pinpointing and breaking bad habits. Like eating ice cream in the middle of the night; the mental game is about holding yourself accountable. The mental game is about taking responsibility for your choices. To get yourself prepared to do the actions of loosing weight and getting fit.. you have to change your mind set. For example; while I was pregnant and unable to work out due to my high risk pregnancy I would watch a show called X Weighted on Slice Networks. A Canadian show about trainers and nutritionists going into peoples homes to show them how to clean out their kitchens and minds of garbage. I was preparing to hit the ground running when my son was born..but I knew it was going to take years to reach my fitness goals of being ultra fit.. because it had taken 7 years of being pregnant 7x ( I lost 4 of the pregnancies due to complications and miscarriage ) but I knew from being super fit in my 20s it would take even longer to get it back in my 40s..so my goals were reasonable.

The most important thing about weight loss and fitness is that you keep eating.. you cut your portion sizes in half or into thirds if you were really over doing it..and you make 3 large meals into 6 small meals..or even 8 small meals. You don’t eat before bed.. you do not go to bed with a full tummy..this slows down your metabolism ..and causes your body to store those calories as fat over night.

The mental game comes into play when you fall off the wagon.. you don’t give yourself permission or EXCUSES to stay off the wagon..get back on that fucking wagon.. I don’t care if you binged for 3 days..get back on that wagon. The mental game; there are no perfect conditions, you will get colds, headaches, your kids will drive you nuts.. your husband.. wife.. boyfriend or girlfriend will piss you off.. but that just means you use it as fuel..as a challenge to continue..you remember why your doing it..because of point #5 and point #7

Start slowly if you are really out of shape.. start with walking, swimming, yoga..soft movements that help you shed the weight so that you can increase your level of fitness when you become more comfortable by removing the bulk. If you over do it and hurt yourself, you will not enjoy it.. you will quit. Allow yourself one cheat meal a week.. so that you don’t feel deprived..but remember you are a food addict.. so you must be honest .. keep a food diary to keep you honest with yourself. I know many people who say ” I don’t know why I don’t loose weight .. I eat so healthy..it’s just genetics?” but they have frozen cream puffs in their freezer..hidden away from friends and family… or sometimes they say that to me while eating a bag of processed potato chips.. be honest with yourself..take responsibility.. keep it real with you..to prove you love your spouse or family/friends .. you are honest.. love yourself and be honest.

As you begin to loose weight and you become more comfortable with your body in action you can increase your training.. you can become fit rather than just thin.. it’s about health..not the thigh gap.. you can go to #8.. get training.. push yourself over new peaks to greater levels.. you can feel like and look like a super hero.. you can become more youthful..

The #1 excuse that people use ” I don’t have time ” but they have time to watch TV every night and be on Facebook constantly..so yes you do have time.. you can organize your time to make the time. I am a single mother of three. I get up hrs before my kids to have my coffee and breakfast..pack my gym bag and go and do it. I don’t watch TV.. I took the Facebook app off my phone. I don’t bring my phone into the gym or to the track or trail..but I check my phone in the change room now and then to make sure my kids are fine. I have the energy to keep up with my kids, the house work, my part time job and my own big dream as a published author; of beginning a movement towards freeing women of sexual repression..because I give myself ..self love and care. I make the time for me. When my kids were smaller I put them in the gym daycare…bright and early.. brought their breakfast and sippy cups.. and took full advantage of my 2 hrs. You can do this if you WANT IT.. you can reprogram your mind to tell your body to do what it wants it to do.. you have the spirit to tap into if you choose it.. you can be healthy, fit and athletic if you really want it..

You have to organize your mind to organize your time..and to organize your life..

Sometimes you have to loose old friends to loose old habits.. because they will pull you back into those habits..but you will make new friends by joining a gym or fitness organization..

But remember.. the longest journey starts one step at a time.. a clean body starts one bite at a time..

For your body to be the temple it is meant to be.. treat it that way. Don’t wait for tomorrow start TODAY!

7 years later.. sweat; grunting, early mornings.. running. Don’t skip the cardio .. lifting things up and slamming them down.

7 years later.. no short cuts, no fancy diet.. just organic food, water, whey powder, going to bed early and working my ass off at the trail, track and gym

Fat Shaming vs Fitness Shaming

 

This is going to be interesting…. because I have experienced both.

 

When I was a young teen and woman I was very fit.. I started into my first real relationship when I was 18.. the first guy I was intimate with. We lived together common law. I was going to college, working and doing everything around the house, including all the yard work..because the young guy that I was living with was making his way into becoming a drunk. I started eating my feelings and denial. I loved him, but there wasn’t anything I could do for him. I found myself overweight for the first time in my life. It was at the beach that I had my first wake up call.. it was a bunch of young children talking about the “fat lady” ..they were talking about me! Was it fat shaming..? .. or just plain honesty. At the time I thought their mothers should of killed them at birth..but in the next couple of weeks it started to sink in. I left my dunk.. to go and live with my sister ..and I lost the weight. I got honest with my feelings, with my diet and with my activities. It came off pretty fast too..

I went to the gym..and I found my love of pushing myself..but then what I got was the opposite of fat shaming… I got fitness shaming.. from people who just didn’t want to reach for that level of fitness and health.. I was told I was a fanatic ..

In that time I met and married my now ex husband. I was super fit and healthy..when I gained weight in my pregnancies .. my ex turned into a jerk. I was told I couldn’t work out due to my very low blood pressure.. My husband at the time couldn’t stand my weight gain, all though I couldn’t do anything about it. I had to eat tons of salt to keep my blood pressure up, and I would faint constantly. I was bloated and ugly.. and the way he looked at me..and flirted with other women ..told me so.

After having my second daughter, I remember my worse fat shaming experience. I had been on bed rest through that pregnancy. I had morning sickness 3x a day, I was hospitalized for dehydration a couple of times. I was in rough shape at the end of that pregnancy. But off to the gym I went, and that is when I experienced the meanest guy ever. As I ran/walked on the treadmill he loudly made fun of me to the other men at the juice bar. ” Look at that one, trying to run..she is going to shake the entire gym down guys.” I was shocked..and full of nursing hormones. It was really easy for me to cry. I did start to cry, I just couldn’t help it, my hormones took over. I missed my babies at home, it was hard for me to do something just for me. I got off the treadmill and walked up to the man with tears streaming down my face..and I said ” I shouldn’t have to explain to you that I just had a baby, that I was sick in my pregnancy and that is why I look this way.” I noticed that he was not in perfect shape, I saw a bit of a beer belly..and then I said pointing to his belly. ” do you miss your baby too.” It was funny, but the guys around the juice bar were to ashamed to laugh.. I never went back to that gym.. I switched to another one. I never wanted to see that man again. It was fat shaming at it’s worst. You just never know what another person has gone through.

Yet I do know people who smoke, eat fried foods, fast food, drink like fish, do drugs, and sit on their asses all day watching TV and playing video games..that get up my ass for being to into fitness..

At this time in my life; I am very fit. I love the gym, it is my home away from home. I have a gym family, I enjoy pushing myself and learning as much as I can about fitness. My friends say I should become a personal trainer.. I am thinking about it. The whole student loan thingy doesn’t appeal to me..but it is my one of my major passions.

People have said to me in round-about ways that I am shallow for being so into the body..that it is all about looks..but for me it is about sport..it is about health, it is about pushing the boundaries..to ultimate fitness..but I get shit sometimes for my fitness post. I get told to slow down, that I am obsessive.. is this fitness shaming?

Lets be honest.. you are what you eat, but sometimes your health can be out of your control..but you can work yourself into a heart failure.. high blood pressure and obesity if your not honest with your lifestyle.

I do get fed up hearing people bitch about how shitty their health is .. yet they still smoke, drink, eat shitty food and refuse to get off their asses..

I see people at my gym who have been in car accidents, had major surgery..yet they refuse to give in..they will be their best self..

As far as the kids that called me fat.. I think they called me out..as only children’s honesty can do..

Is my body perfect? Hell no.. I am I healthy and fit.. hell yes..

Am I ashamed of my fitness lifestyle.. hell no.

If I was a personal trainer and I knew you were bullshitting yourself.. It would be my job to call you out.

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