Sex, submission and control the hottest, hot button words in the erotic publishing world.
Why do you suppose this is?
Do we seek out giving our control to other’s as a way of raising or senses to the risk of total domination.. if so why do we seek out a lover to dominate us..and why do lovers seek to dominate?
Does this act of domination and control start before the bedroom? Can we actually be having sex with others, and can we be being sexually dominated and dominate others without the actual physical act of sex?
Do we live in a world that sees women predominately as the submissive sex partner? And if so why?
As women why do we want to be dominated.. can it be sexually healthy..and if so when does it turn around to becoming an unhealthy addiction?
Are we all secretly co-dependents and narcissists.. do we all move through both states of co-dependents to narcissists .. to the submissive and the one who dominates? What if both states are healthy within reason? Is this why we seek it out..to play out the negative and positive polarities in the bedroom?
Why do we think drama is unhealthy when it makes life so interesting? Why do we think highs and lows amount to depression..when they could simply be our natural state of being?
We seek to be controlled to let go for the sake of the rush..for the drama.. to simply not know the outcome of the sexual adventure..and we seek to dominate to have the outcome within our control..therefore causing both states to bring about a high in the state of arousal.. why should this be considered wrong.. if it doesn’t hurt either party?
Some seek to only dominate..as this brings them a pure state of erotic bliss..and for the submissive the same..other’s play both roles for the same reasons..
It simply becomes unhealthy when the trust is broken..when one hurts or demeans the other or the one being hurt has an acute victim complex..
Until then keep the play and drama going.. spank, whip, call names, nails and hot wax.. pretend others are watching.