I think I chose a really good title for this post .. considering Canada just blew the world away in Men and Women’s Hockey cleaning up all the Gold!
If games are upfront..and center .. it’s fair play.. but when one person isn’t aware that they are even playing .. then it is subterfuge: deceit used in order to achieve one’s goal.
What I is even worse .. when someone shows the are vulnerable.. and the other person who is being deceitful uses it as a springboard or leverage.. that is the cost of being authentic..be it online or in daily life..there are always people out there who are tempted to use it to achieve a one sided goal..
As a woman.. it makes me very sad..and it makes me feel somewhat hopeless towards men in general.. as to..
Is there any fair play???
This is my letter to a guy that I have known for years.. I didn’t use his name..as I am not trying to play a game of vengeance.. I am sharing this as an example of how to PLAY FAIR.. in The Art of Love and Relationships…
“”Now that I have had sometime to think about last night.. and to listen to my instincts .. I really don’t want you to contact me.
I knew when I saw you by the bar that you were watching my facebook.. and that is why you showed up to a place you haven’t been to in years.
I like I told you I have had that happen before. Even before I set up my website or wrote my blog about sacred sex and women’s sexuality..
I know your type well now. You see my pictures on facebook and some sexual content and that is all you are drawn to.. you see a single woman who is craving intimacy thinking that I will fall for a few lines.. be fooled into thinking something wonderful will happen when your just looking to use me for sex.
That became very apparent to me when I played pool with you.. you didn’t even know what my book was about.. yet you have been on my facebook.. probably a couple of years..
You didn’t know about my struggles with the local networking community..with their prejudice against me.. as to why I needed to be online to promote my book.. you didn’t even know why my book was so controversial..
This told me that you didn’t and don’t give a shit about who I am as a person.. all you see is a sex toy.
Being a smart woman has it’s perks.. studying human behavior and psychology has it’s perks as well.. I could see through all of your small talk..as you attempted to make a superficial emotional connection with me..by saying things like ” I hate how fucked up society is too ” I watched you watch me for a reaction.. as you tried to create a false bond,,of fake trust.
I suppose it could be.. that I have lived a few years now..and I can see where this is going ..I can see it around corners now.. I have met many guys like you.. who will say anything to get laid..
I know that you were not “Kidding” when you asked me to go home with you because you won the game of pool.. I know that when you were touching my hair and earrings that you were tying to get me to kiss you..
You can’t blame a guy for trying… But you can call out the game..
If you are just looking to have sex with a woman you should be upfront with that.. don’t tell women what you think they want to hear just so you can score..
You are just recently separated.. so if your just looking for sex.. be honest with women and show some respect for their feeling and needs.. you would be shocked to find that there are some women who just want sex.
Playing me was very disrespectful.
You clearly have no interest in me as a person.. not caring enough to find out about who I am when the information has been made available to you on your facebook for years..
You didn’t even know the title of my book..
I am blocking you for these reasons..
Because their isn’t any point to having a man on my facebook who isn’t intelligent enough to see me as a person past my sexuality..
Boys will be boys..
But I am looking for a man..
I hope you have learned something from this..
Try to pick up less intelligent women.. or man up..
Just being honest.. good luck”"
There is this weird things that some guys do.. a tell-tail sign that they are looking for a reason or an OK.. to treat a woman as just sex.. the ask things like ” Why are you hear?” like asking did you come out to a club to find sex.. I had a guy ask me once ” Why did you move to Kelowna?” I told him ” To get away from my ex and find work or opportunies in a big city.” he said ” I bet your looking for men.” it’s like they are looking for a reason to treat a woman with disrespect..as if to say.. “You have low morals, so I am going to treat you like that.. cause you deserve it.” .. it is to admonish them from being responsible for hurting or using woman..as if to say ” You asked for it.”
All men are not like this of course.. this post is to educate my readers as usual.. to teach people about the conscious and subconscious games that we play..and that we can let ourselves be played by not listening to our intuition.