Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Kelowna Culture in Retrospect-fades to grey

 

When I moved to Kelowna BC from the small town of Armstrong BC, just an hour and a half away I thought it would be a city full of opportunity for me as an artist/writer/activist and on a personal level as a newly divorced, broken hearted single mother; I might find a new love.

I had always wanted to write my book; even as a small child I was accutely aware of the double standards, violence and sexism against women. I thought the Goddess or Wonder Woman was and still is a empowering archetype towards empowering women and girls. The main reason behind my book was to show that women and men could both be strong, emotional, compassionate and that both the sexes could strive towards true justice and equality. As a very small child raised in a strict christian household, I was still a wise old soul whom saw past the shame and sin placed on sexuality as unfounded and just silly. I would prance naked around my repressed mother as she squacked and clucked at me for my sinful nature with glee and mischeif. I just knew that logically the shame placed on sexuality and the body was unnatural not sex and sexuality.

Anyways upon moving to Kelowna and writing, producing the goddess photography or photographs of me as many goddesses, upon designing and publishing my website and blog, I was continually shocked at how the arts council and at how the leaders of Kelowna’s culture treated me as a second class citizen. I was not allowed to join in networking groups, I was not given the press release that the art’s council promised me. I was not allowed to show my book or other art in galleries or other art exhibits. I was not heard by Colin Basran, he called me to tell me there was nothing he could do about the outright prejudice and discrimination placed upon me by the leaders of Kelown’s cultural networking organizations. He told me he could not make people include me. I was made of mockery of by Laurie Welborn who’s name came up on our phone conversation. She did a video of the topless issue after pretending to be my friend off and on Facebook, it was obvious online bullying and even after she made the videos she then asked me to my face if I felt suicidal. During this time I was also harassed out of Brett Wilson’s gym by his female manager a close friend of Laurie’s, because I was told my online profile or my writing about the discrimination, sexuall harssment, sexual discrimination and women’s sexuality was a threat to Brett Wilson’s reputation. The Mayor of Kelowna was made aware of all these facts yet because I was not wealthy or well connected I simply didn’t matter to Kelowna’s socieity or culture. If I had, had a Batchelor of the Arts or other degrees I would probably of been given some credibility, but I am self taught, a natural talent, self read, self motivated, self starter and well studied and well read on my own; but in Kelowna this holds no credibility. In Kelowna’s culture of wealth and social status I was invisible. I was a minority I was an annoyance to the wealthy and connected that wanted and that wants to manipulate and mold Kelowna’s culture as they see fit; like Colin Basran, the wealthy and highly connected Cipes family and the private owners of KelownaNow. I was purposefully shut out of and silenced from Kelowna’s culture as a threat towards Kelowna’s professional and pristeen tourist orientated brand. Kelowna’s culuture has become a tourist brand. I was made invisible by sexual prejudice, ignorance and going by Laurie’s videos.. hate.

Looking in retrospect at Kelowna’s culture; it is culture based on wealth and the accumulation of wealth; as Kelowna tried to paint me over with shades of grey to make me invisible as a part from the culture or IMAGE they wish to create and brand, Kelowna is grey or bland in it’s culture as it steals from other cultures what it feels is culturally safe and acceptable- but isn’t this just the Canadian way of the arts in general? What is Canadian culture but a washed out version of American or US culture? And we wonder why Candian artist can’t make a go of it in Canada?

I was the biggest feminist in Kelowna but Kelowna effectively phased me out by overwhelming me and my children through me by it’s overt prejudice towards me. But my children and I are slowly loosing our Kelowna Culture wash; my kids are not feeling the need to be overly competative or to dress to impress others, and I am finding peace and solitude in the countryside. It is all slowly fading to grey.

I learned that I never needed to be in Kelowna to pursue my arts and feminist activism and that I would never of met anyone in that culture due to how they would be washed by that culture into seeing me through prejudice. I learned that I am unique and special, special enought to stand out from the crowd and make it on my own an on my own terms..and by make it, I mean being me and doing what I love. I can share and educate here through my own creations.

Open Letter to the Canadian RCMP

Update – soon after sending this email and posting this to my blog I was called by the police inspector and given a verbal apology.
This is a modified email that I sent out the Vernon Police Inspector
I don’t expect any action from the police due to the fact that it is clearly a boy’s club. Just going by my own personal experiences thought my life and by seeing how other women around me, including my own mother have been treated by the RCMP I am expecting no real justice.
Reading the popular media, in the last year a Canadian judge told a rape victim in court that she should of just kept her legs together and just recently a female officer quit her job of 14 years of trying to educate the male force towards sexual harassment and discrimination. The female officer quit her job due to sexual harassment and discrimination. Clearly this is a boy’s club and obviously my complaints and my story will be covered up.
Inspector ********* left me a phone message saying that Cost. ******** who delivered the letter to me for the gym owner Peter ******** was inappropriate but he is a young officer so he didn’t really know any better. This is clearly an excuse. As an officer of the law it is his duty to be impartial and to serve the law not the boy’s club at Peter’s gym. It is the duty of the police force to protect me as a woman against sexual discrimination and harassment, not to further harass me for the retired police officer Len; who not only asked me how much for sexual favors but it was his and the owner’s intention to scare me out of the unisex area and out of the gym, so that they could continue to further discriminate against other female members without being held accountable. The owner’s language and those of his friends that participate, is the language of hate speech. Peter clearly stated in the video that he wanted the guys down stairs to be able to talk about what ever they wanted, that includes bashing other religions, races, cultures, gays and women. Clearly this is against human rights and this man shouldn’t be able to legally run a business that is based on discrimination and harassment of those who don’t meet his personal specifications. Peter should not have a business licence and should not be serving the public as we all know hate speech and discrimination cause hate crimes like what just happened in Quebec.
If I as a woman, cannot give a statement to the RCMP about sexual harassment with out the police coming back onto me, in my home, invading my personal life and privacy; how than can any woman report even more serious crimes like rape?
The police have terrorized me. I don’t feel safe in my own home. The date rape that I buried subconsciously has now risen to the surface of my awareness; and I am experiencing emotionally all the effects of deep trauma. I am so glad that I did not report my date rape to the police here in Armstrong BC, six years ago as I am sure I would of been blamed for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I had physical injuries due to the rape but I am sure it would of been written off by the police as just rough sex. It seems to me that the police protect men and their reputations over women and their rights to be treated with respect and dignity.
After Constable ******** left me with the letter and his horrible condescending attitude of threatening me with arrest should I trespass back into the gym, I was left feeling hopeless and suicidal. I felt and I was punished by the police for daring to make a statement of sexual harassment and sexual discrimination against a retired police officer and a male gym owner. Obviously these men are of more importance to the police and to the law than I am as a woman. Obviously it is criminally offensive for a woman to dare to stand up to sexual harassment and obviously female police officers find the same fate within the system.
We are living in very sad and sorrowful times are we not?
Inspector ********* has left a message with me as has Les ****** of the Enderby police department. I have returned their messages but I have not been called back.
It would be just and right if the police gave me a public apology towards their own actions of not following proper procedure instead of making excuses and attempting to bury it under red tape and paper work. I think that the intent is that I will give up hope and drop it, and that I will just get on with my life. It seems to me the intention is to rip away my self worth and to induce hopelessness so that the matter doesn’t have to be properly addressed by the RCMP.
Going by what is happening Canada wide and by the tone of how the world treats women and their rights.. I am sure all women will be continued to be treated as property and second class citizens. It doesn’t seem to matter if you live by the letter of the law, pay your taxes and respect authority as clearly male based authority doesn’t respect women in general.
I have put ********* into the names to protect privacy and so that the law doesn’t once again come back onto me. I am publishing this to protect myself should the police further discriminate against me as retaliation or punishment, and to also show the truth should the gym owner have members make up false stories to cover himself.

Keeping The Wild Vagina’s Free

 

As we all know those who love to practice misogyny don’t want to see vagina’s owning themselves and running free to cause rebellion and havoc upon a perfectly constructed society based on male rule and the worship of the penis. I found this out just recently at a local redneck gym ran by a redneck and his male friends. It turns out that these guys want to see women working out to create a body that is perfect for the male gaze or judgment vs for their own health or athletic standards; you see that would mean those sweaty vagina’s would be free and we can’t have that. We can’t have that because then it would impact these men to the point of  having to please someone other than themselves; and god forbid that they would actually have to figure out how to bring a woman to orgasm and finally be forced to figure out just were the effing clitoris is actually located. You see vagina’s that are held in captivity by the ownership of a husband or boyfriend are just existing for the pure sake of male penetration and for the male orgasm which must come first ( pun intended ) cum first.. get it? So that is why vagina’s have penetration pricing; that is how you make a wild vagina into a tame vagina because of such low pay placed on to those with wild vagina’s the vagina must submit to male ownership by relationship or marriage so that the vagina can afford the basics for survival. If you give the vagina treats such as a nice wedding, diamond rings, and shopping trips with the odd holiday get-away thrown in than you are able to domesticate the wild vagina into the ways of organized misogyny. Wild vagina’s like mine are considered a threat by the Gang Of Misogyny because they can tempt the other domesticated vagina’s back into the wild by their love of rebellion and vibrators.

The wild vagina is free to think thoughts of it’s own as it doesn’t have a male owner constantly yapping and brainwashing misogynistic dogma and threats at it, that cause it to undermine it’s patterns of free flowing thoughts towards things like running it’s own business and writing disgusting ( fun ) blog post like this. The wild vagina will lead the domestic and tamed vagina’s into thoughts of rebelling against it’s male master by demanding that it’s orgasmic needs must be met before male penis penetration or ejaculation, the wild vagina is the black sheep of the domestic vagina and it will cause the tame vaginas to wander outside of the male boundaries or fences placed around them to keep them in the kitchen baking apple pies, knitting and thinking about having yet another baby to fill their craving for the freedom of the unknown.

The wild vagina is the newly divorced friend of your wife or girlfriend; or her sister that refuses to settle down, when she comes a knocking she awakens the rebel within your woman causing her to think her own thoughts, want her own way. She manages to get her to recall her dreams that she put aside so that you could make your dreams top priority. The wild vagina is a gypsy that dances in the middle of the night with a bottle of wine in hand talking back to those men who tell her to be more lady like.. and she seduces the tame and domesticated vagina’s to want to run free into the night. She encourages the domesticated and collared vaginas to want to orgasm and explore what is deep within the creamy swells of her own thighs.. and the misogynist thinks ” What if she finds out her vibrator can give her more satisfaction that I can and those bible verses are all bullshit that I use to keep her chained to an ideal of womanhood that is based on just the pleasure of men.. what if she starts to seek out her own pleasure and thoughts?”

And so the misogynist chase away the rebellious and free vagina’s to keep the white sheep in the corral and in the kitchen.. they call the wild vaginas sluts, whores and fornicators.

Off into the night the wild vagina goes with the free ass dude on his Harley that knows never to tame the wild vagina’s because they are the best kind.

For the dumb ass people who don’t get this post it is pure sarcasm. It is to show the stupidity of society when it comes to women’s sexuality, as to how threatening single women can be treated and judged by scared and ignorant men as well as jealous women who have internalized male misogyny by being constantly brainwashed by misogynistic dogma or even religion. 

Keep the vagina’s wild and free my friends and to those domesticated vagina’s you know how much you love your gypsy friends.

Spiritual Ego Persona

 

The spiritual ego persona is the branding of a person or persona towards the marketing of a spiritual practice. Examples of spiritual practices – yoga, meditation, reciting and creating mantras, fasting or vegan diets, prayer, sweat lodges, spiritual retreats, readings and vision quests. The marketing of these practices turns the spiritual practice into dogma and even into fundamentalist beliefs and perspectives. Spiritual practices are meant to be given by a spiritual teacher towards helping the seeker find away towards breaking negative and destructive patterns of behavior. Spiritual practices are meant to be uniquely crafted by the spiritual teacher for the seeker so that they can make their specific unconscious patterns of behavior conscious, or raise them up towards the surface of awareness to be healed.

I am writing this because I am seeing an online trend towards just about anyone picking up a deck of tarot cards or oracle cards and doing live videos on Facebook, then projecting a spiritual ego persona that is leading people away from true awareness and  spiritual health. I was working for a YouTube famous astrologer who had a media lady take over her marketing. I learned through her trying to create a spiritual persona for me, to market me, just how fake spiritual marketing can be. It is dangerous. Many people who are hired by people like this media lady are often just as misguided as the people they are selling their guidance to. I was hired by the astrologer before the media lady came on board, and because I wouldn’t lie I was soon phased out and given no promotion by her and so I quit to go and work on my own; choosing to release myself from the negative energy. The people that her media specialist chose to hire after she phased out the many like myself that had a true talent and connection to a higher place; well they are desperate people who are willing to be puppets of manipulation just for money. I am sorry to tell you that many spiritualists and readers online have a persona and are willing to sell you endless readings leading you in circles just to keep you paying for more.

I recently had a client tell me I was wrong in one of my readings, she was upset. I told her the truth ” I am wrong sometimes because I am a human being. I am not a guru but I do have a natural talent and high intuition.” but many of the fake spiritualist online will tell you they are 100% accurate all the time. I see people as paying for my time and my 90% accuracy and so that is why my rates are affordable. A reader or spiritualist cannot affect your free will or the free will of others, we can only tell you what our guides and the cards show us.

And so as synchronicity would have it,  as I was thinking about writing this post I asked my guides and angels to help me find more information towards confirming my thoughts and towards helping me explain myself, or to clarify. I came upon a page on Facebook called Tantra where they posted a video bite from Stephen Wollinsky called ( Nothing comes from Nothing ) on Youtube, were he was talking about the spiritual traps or the illusions of spirituality, then by comments they sent me to the full video, that is just over 2 hrs long. I took some short notes on what I gathered from him and his wisdom to share with you.

The spiritual ego or persona perpetuates the need for perfection or purity for the sake of lifestyle or trends, as to how you look, the clothes you wear, how you act or behave that leads one more towards the material world than awareness.

Spirituality or the trap of being caught in spiritual practices for the sake of ego persona leads to ego illusion instead of towards the nothingness or absolute. Spirituality becomes a game and it leads to dogma and manipulations when practiced through a persona rather than as a path towards higher paths that lead to the state of zen, that brings us to the absolute or cosmic mind.

The place of zen or the way towards the cosmic mind is through the paradox of ( I am and I am not ) ( There is everything and there is nothing ) it is the space between the breaths or the cracking of an atom.

False Gurus or spiritual teachers are about who they are rather than about who you are, they are about you following their spiritual personification or ego rather than helping you find the right path towards becoming your own Guru or awareness.

Real Gurus are not popular because they practice the zen of being within the paradox; not being within their personifications. They know I am and I am not. I real spiritual leader or teacher will not sell you instant gratification or glamour, they will not sell you on sugar coated words; a real Guru will crack your ego personifications wide open. A real Guru or teacher will show you the unconscious parts of your soul and help you expose them to the light. There is nothing glamorous and glitzy about the real teachers.

A false Guru or teacher traps you with spiritual games such as dogma and guilt trips; a real Guru sets you free.

We also see some that preach about manifestation, really preaching about desire that promotes lack rather than abundance as it draws our attention to what we don’t have, rather than gratitude. Some abundance manifestation is really the greed of the material world rather than seeking the abundance of love and health as well as worldly wealth. Some abundance manifestation practices can lead us to attachment rather than awareness and true enlightenment.

The awakened do not desire through the perception of the ego for there is nothing to desire in a world of illusion but to become aware and conscious of the dream or illusion.

The dangers of New Age Marketing is that it is leading us away from the soul’s journey, and towards more ego density or desire.

The Year of the Rooster in Politics/ year of the cocks

 

This year is basically going to be the year of the dictators ( dick taters ) get it? It is going to be the year of political posturing and strutting by many of our world leaders and we are going to all become wise to just how much of a boy’s club the political arena really is. The Year of the Fire Rooster starts just when Trump takes up the throne of power or  the presidency, what a coincidence? When we look at Trump’s birth astrology we see that he is a shooting star or rather a person that takes no one’s advice but his own. He is a lover of the limelight and will not be able to play well with others. This year produces and influences our world leaders towards the pursuit of their own single minded success verses the success of the people they rule for as they see themselves as ruling over us, not ruling for us. They will be inflexible and unable to seek compromises within the first six months of this year until every rooster finds his own roost or boundaries in which he can rule personally. We will see Trump lead the role of inquisitor towards those he defines as having done him wrong during his running.. like The New York Times as they chose the side of is advisory Hilary Clinton and printed stories that undid his authority; or so he thinks.

This is the year that the press will become divided as it will become clear to the common people by the inquisitions, what publishers of the news are actually using journalistic integrity. If we thought they were not before it will become very obvious just how tainted our press really is. It will become very obvious that we are being spoon fed our information by powerful dictators like Trump. Hollywood and Hollywood actors and actresses will become divided in protesting, for being used as puppets towards brainwashing the common people, there will be a new type of star born out of the half truths and lies put on them to project to the common public. A new trend will surface towards being raw, open and honest as well as being a rebel with a cause; as it serves the highest good of the people.

This will not be a time to protest in the streets or to riot or to be near any of these protest or riots as the dictator like energy of this year will cause marshal laws to be enforced, it is best to protest in a more passive way like not investing in companies or people that are being run by the dictatorships. This will hold true world wide, if people protest in mass there will be mass punishments. We see stupid and small meaningless laws being made and past by the governments to further keep civilians in line by the threat of jail time and fines. This is a year were war is very possible due to the inflexible energy of many men going for the brass ring or wanting to rule the world rather than just their roost, many men of great worldly power using that power and influence to feed their own gigantic egos.

This is the year of intense ego clashes that could lead to war and mass suffering over the cause of personal freedoms.

Men to be concerned with? Donald Trump first and foremost as he is the trip wire or the catalyst that starts the ego fires in the other world leaders by not respecting boundaries and borders. Kevin O’Leary the Canadian reality show star who wishes to out Justin Trudeau, who will not respect him or his leadership and Justin Trudeau who will not allow protesting in Canada over the laying of oil and gas pipelines . Trump will be in a battle of egos with Vladimir Putin over boarders, spying, military strength and media lies and Trump will also be clashing with Kim Jong Un the leader of North Korea over nukes. Kim Jong Uh has already somewhat relented in the press because he is crazy and it takes crazy to know crazy. Of course this is just the tip of the iceberg, there will be much more and it will produce much fear around the world… but..

The egos will begin to relent by the late spring or early summer giving us all some personal relief, but it will be intense and it will leave us all thinking ” Who are these children with nukes that are running our world!?

So buckle up and batten down the hatches, remember to stay away from anything like protests and just stay calm and detach from the media and political drama as much as you can. We will all get through the big boy’s temper tantrums.

Coming To My Senses

 

When I wasn’t even fully awake this morning; my eyes not yet even open, the thought that came into my consciousness was ” No more assholes.”  I was waking up in the country to open my drapes to see the snow covered mountains to the sound of the early morning train. I love the sound of the train at night and the coyotes. The coyotes sound so hauntingly beautiful and mysterious on the cold and snowy winter nights. I woke up to waking up; to a feeling of coming back to my senses or the center of myself. It was a peaceful yet a radical awakening as I realized I didn’t ever have to fight anyone for anything when I was living in the city of Kelowna. I realized I didn’t even have to move to Kelowna to create my book and I realized, I can and I will, create whatever the fuck I want, whenever I fucking want to. When I left the city I left them to their own devices and I realized upon awakening that I always should have. I should of never cared what they thought of me or how they labeled me to suit their own purposes and insecurities. There ignorance was theirs to own not for me to trouble myself with even addressing, towards giving them or their issues any of my time.

My soul feels nourished once more and I do feel whole once more and reborn into myself and my own internal power. It is like I walked back into a mirror to walk into myself. All the names that they called me and all the things that they would have me believe myself to be, have fallen away and they are with them in Kelowna.

Before I awoke to my thought of ” No more assholes.” I had a dream. In my dream I was in a hologram and I was erasing parts of the illusion until it was gone. I stepped out of the hologram and back into my own life.. and so it was that Kelowna, I was in a 6 year bad dream that I allowed to be real by accepting the illusions that others projected towards me. My dream was my subconscious becoming conscious and awakening me to myself while I awoke. It was a dream of everyday magic; and that my friends is true awareness.

I have a new attitude towards my life now, I have a new attitude towards others who question my life and me as a person ( You are not my problem and I don’t have to explain a damn thing to you about my choices or my life )

I don’t need to fight anyone to be heard. If you don’t want to hear me that is your choice and it’s my choice not to give a damn and my choice to move towards life and happiness and way from assholes.

I am not going to waste my life and that is my time here on this planet, attempting to be the asshole whisperer. I am going to walk towards the light and happiness and teach my children to do the same. I am going to spend my time and energy on people who respect me, love me and who want to hear my message. I am turning my attention towards love, hope and joy. I am being fully emotionally present with my children, as in the past asshole’s nasty energy took my energy and time away from my kids. Not anymore. I am turning my back on all those who don’t matter and giving my love and attention to those who do..including myself.

I know logically it will take another 100 years or so before women have the same sexual freedoms and rights as men. I have done my part for society and for the human race upon writing my book ( The Goddess an Expression of the Divine Feminine ) available on Amazon.ca

So now I am going to let it ride on the hands of fate. I will keep writing, but I am not pushing and I am not fighting.. what is meant to be will be.. I am going to enjoy my life and peace.

A New Life

 

It has been about a month now since I moved out of Kelowna. I know it’s very hard for nonspiritual people to understand this; but it was my guides or my Angels that guided me out of Kelowna. I was told by them under the full moon light, to go north. I was shown clearly in a vision and in dreams that north was home; I was shown that I was supposed to be close to nature so that I could heal from the pain of the many rejections that I experience in Kelowna. You know the spirit works in mysterious ways, very much like the 12th Lord or the 12th house in astrology. These mysterious spiritual ways are very Neptunian, dream like, like mists of figures that you see out of the corner of your eye, or when you hear your name called out just before waking.. and so they called to me to follow the north star home. I completed my spiritual purpose or mission in Kelowna. I created my book and I did all the things I had to do to set the hands on the clock of fate.. and such is divine timing..but they haven’t let me know much about that. Somethings like divine timing are mysteries to those of us in the flesh, and that is why we have faith. But I was told to lay it all in their hands and go into obscurity, to set my ego down and let go and let God. And so I have. I pulled these runes to let them tell you and me as to why I had to do what I did.. when I moved back into the country.. were you can leave your doors unlocked and walk around naked with your drapes open because there is nobody to see.

 

Ansuz ~ To be with the Divine and know the true nature of my own divinity, to give my children peace and a stable home.

Inguz ~ To find harmony and balance through better personal relationships with more grounded and centered people. To clear away old relationships to bring in people into my life who are real so that I can experience the wholeness of myself by being able to be my true self around them. By being able to be my true self without other’s inhibitions being placed on to me; I will come to wholeness and then meet a mate who will love me for my true self.

Sowelu ~ My life force returning by my regeneration of not giving my energy to others who refuse to see me or respect me for who I truly am. The retreat was a retreat of strength as I no longer will be present for others to drain me of my energy because they cannot find their own light within. Many mistake the light in others as a way to drain and feed their own egos with it; by my leaving such people or such a society I am now keeping my life force to myself. I will grow stronger as I become more and more of who I am by not allowing them my time or the space to ego feed off of my light or spirit. I will regenerate and heal my aura or light body. I will develop the art of doing without doing.

 

Kelowna or the city life was a rat race. Kelowna’s society was highly competitive without completion; in other words all their striving was for nothing but to say ” I am the most popular.”  If  I would of stayed in Kelowna I would of lost my freaking mind. I just couldn’t make sense of the fake business world that was not professional or the fake spiritual world that was based on trendy clothes, popularity, ass kissing and PURE EGO. My sensitive soul simply couldn’t tolerate it.

When I fell in love with a man named Matthew Cipes upon our first meeting it was just that, it was me seeing his soul and loving him unconditionally. I still do. But even though he is apart of the spiritual community he couldn’t trust me or that love. And I forgive him because it is uncondtional. But many in the spiritual community came at me to hurt me for daring to feel that way ,to tell him about it and to write about it. That is what is maddening about Kelowna and Kelowna society. I wasn’t considered good enough or pure enough or something not enough to dare feel love for someone who was considered to be way above me by societies standards or financial standards. He and they wanted me to feel ashamed for my feelings, he and they were so intentionally mean. But so many things about Kelowna are just awfully mean.

The thing is this; the refection of how I feel about him is a projection of the love that I have inside of me…and so doesn’t it make sense that the cruelty that they showed me is a reflection of how they feel about themselves or what is inside of them? I have absolutely nothing to gain here by saying that I loved him instantly upon laying eyes on him almost 2 years ago as I have left the city. I am sure I will never see him again. I have nothing to gain but to attempt to alchemize or transmute hate into to love.. but then I am not responsible for how others react or how they behave towards me; as that is their own perceptions to take responsibility for.

He or many in the spiritual community would say to me ” How did you attract this situation into your life.” it is a spiritualistic way of not taking responsibility for how they or he treated me. I didn’t attract other’s willful ignorance they are responsible for their own humanness or shortcomings. The point is I saw through the lens of love it was their bitterness that I allowed to eventually taint me.

But now I am free of that energy and I have cleared the way to let love, love through me once again and I will open up my heart wide again to let the light shine through me .. to let love find me as I find love once again in my new life.

Through a spiritual lens again; I have 6 major planets in my 1st house. This is the house of individuality or identity and that is what I played out in Kelowna. I found my identity and I used my identity as art or expression in my book ( The Goddess an Expression of the Divine Feminine) I used my image in the photography and I used my own life story to express the story of womanhood. My north node is in Pisces and now 6 major planets are going into the house of the 12th Lord and this is about me loosing my identity or my ego to find my pureness or higher-self. According to my chart I will be reborn spiritually by the 3rd of January. My north node was my coming home to my guides or moving north on and in this earthly reality. It is a beautiful spiritual mystery as towards what will happen. But I know this I just have to let go, let God and flow.

Self Objectification is Almost Impossible

 

Every time I post a comment on a new’s feed on Facebook people will say to me ” Your profile picture is a contradiction. It’s silly and ironic that you say you are a feminist while you self objectify with your online image.” My online image has been a problem for me, you see others in the professional world judge me as self objectifying and so they believe this gives them an excuse to treat me with no respect or even to dehumanize me. Because of other’s judging me through a lens of ignorance I am treated by them with total disrespect, as they assume I don’t respect myself because I glorify my body and sexuality.

To get to the point. When a woman acknowledges her femininity and sexuality she isn’t objectifying herself she is whole, she understands that she is her body and her sexuality and is loving her femininity or womanhood. A woman who hates her body and runs away or denies her femininity and sees her sexuality as bad, evil, sinful or slutty is in fact practicing internalized misogyny, she thinks that stepping into her sexuality of femininity will make her less of a person or even dehumanize her to herself and to others. A woman that is internalizing misogyny is often the one calling other women who are comfortable in their bodies, sexuality and sexual expression .. sluts and whores..because she fears being called this herself by others.

Women who have internalized misogyny will often call themselves feminist, and these feminist often man up or make themselves unfeminine, these feminist often tell women who glorify and honor their femininity and sexuality that they are self objectifying and don’t deserve respect or to be taken seriously. Often these women will rage and rant online and off line about women who are whole and healthy in their sexuality because they are afraid to step into their own bodies and own themselves as whole beings.

The patriarchy; a male base social power system that runs society objectifies women by putting women into their lens of approval. Media and the entertainment industry use women to make money while paying them a fraction of what they make off of women’s sexuality. Religion and State mandate women’s wombs and bodies, and that says that women are objects. Women are either virgins or whores through the lens of patriarchy.. we are not whole human beings and our bodies are not our own to regulate as far as they are concerned. And so it is through the lens of other’s judgments that we are objectified… being sexy and sensual as a woman is not self objectification, rather it is being whole and healthy, natural and comfortable in your own skin.

The sad part about female internalized misogyny is that women have been brainwashed into hating their own bodies and sexuality as well as hating on other women. Through internalized misogyny we see other women blaming other women for being raped by judging them as asking for it by the way they present themselves as objects of desire, this is rape culture thinking.

To get down to the point of this post.. a beautiful and sexy woman isn’t self objectifying but rather you are projecting your internalized misogyny onto her ( if you are a woman ) or projecting your misogyny onto her ( if you are a man ) 

Misogynist believe that woman are here for men, that we exist for the male gaze and for male approval and that women don’t have a voice, a personality or a thought unless it has been given and validated by a man.

The patriarchy hates the feminine because it fears loosing power and control should the feminine rise to an equal balance with the masculine..and that is why the feminine and the feminine sex is repressed by hate speech, violence and rape..

But the world needs the feminine to rise so that all of humanity can become healthy, healed and whole.. so next time you see a woman expressing her femininity respect her because she is actually saving humanity from the brutality of the patriarchy, and in a spiritual understanding she is a Goddess, she is honoring The Divine Feminine.

Wonder Woman/ United Nations/Sexual Repression of Women

 

http://www.cbc.ca/news/entertainment/wonder-woman-un-ambassador-over-1.3893625

“Although the original creators may have intended Wonder Woman to represent a strong and independent ‘warrior’ woman with a feminist message, the reality is that the character’s current iteration is that of a large breasted, white woman of impossible proportions, scantily clad in a shimmery, thigh-baring body suit,” the petition read.

Lynda Carter the actress who played Wonder Woman is Hispanic but the fictional character or the Goddess Archetype of Wonder Woman was Greek not white for starters. The statement above is a sexually repressive statement “a large breasted, white woman of impossible proportions, scantily clad in a shimmery, thigh-baring body suit” what it insinuates is that if a woman shows her breasts and thighs she isn’t empowered and isn’t to be taken seriously..and that is sexual repression. This sexually repressive attitude towards women’s bodies and the way they dress themselves trickles down to women being shamed for breastfeeding in public or wearing the wrong thing, at the wrong time, in the wrong place with the wrong man..that lead to HER rape. The statement is stating that women who are sexual and or beautiful, women who are being sexy and or feminine are not empowered but are disempowered, therefore they cannot empower other women.

I want to make this really clear; the reason I show my femininity and or my thighs and breasts in my photography is to own my body and my sexuality on my own terms. The reason I wrote my book ( The Goddess, an Expression of the Divine Feminine ) ~ by Gracie Ackerman.. was to fly in the face of conformity and in the face of a sickened society that is sickened by the patriarchy owning women’s sexuality by repressing us or selling us on their terms. I want to make this perfectly clear * ** as long as women are sexually repressed they will never be free; by being free I mean that they will never have the same human rights and privileges as men*** a man will never be asked if he is raped or beaten ” What were you wearing? Why were you intoxicated? Why were you out so late at night with a bunch of women alone? Did you let them kiss you?” that’s what I mean by human rights and freedom. The freedom to not have the double standards thrown in our faces as a way to control our every thought.. the right not to have to think about { minimizing our risk } or minimizing the amount of cleavage or thigh we show before leaving our home.

I do believe that a woman’s super power is in being in the fullness of her womanhood; in whatever way that looks like to her, in however she defines her femininity or Inner Goddess, be she modest or free in her body. I grew up watching Lynda Carter play Wonder Woman, I have  the DVD collection right by my TV. Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman inspired me to write my book and this blog, she was a huge force in inspiring me. Wonder Woman was both the Artemis and the Venus, this is an ancient understanding or archetype in all women. She is both the virgin and the sexually experienced woman, she is the lover and the warrior. To rip women’s sexuality away from her empowerment is to render her powerless!!!!!!! This stinks of the patriarchy that condescends and controls women like sex slaves. Women become either dumbed down martyrs or whores to be treated as sexual objects to be sold for male profit. We see women being used and sold for profit by the entertainment industry, the beauty industry and by religion that is actually an untaxed business, a business that bases it’s funds on the sexual repression of women.

Feminists are not fugly. When women feel the need to dress and act like men in a corporate world to be taken seriously they have become prisoners of a society that is sickened by the imbalance caused by the repression of women. The Fugly Feminist ~ a woman who purposefully covers up her sexuality to look less attractive or feminine so that she doesn’t distract her male co-workers and so that she will be taken seriously in the conservative business world

Another example of the patriarchy owning women’s sexuality is that it tells women what body type is or isn’t sexy and expects all women to fit into these imposed norms, just recently The Province posted a story about Kim Kardashian’s more heavy set and curvy body setting a trend through Playboy towards allowing women to put on more weight. I just cannot believe a new’s paper would write and publish a story for Playboy towards telling women what men or the patriarchy wants us to look like. In reality the answer is look like who you are! For fuck sakes!!! What century is this!!!!?

Now we have Trump; a out -of -the -closet misogynist, about to step into the powerful role of running modern America! I man who bases the way a woman looks appealing to his eye as to her value in society.. but gawd forbid Wonder Woman should be a role model towards girls and women owning their own sexuality on their own terms.. gawd for bid women should own their bodies at all..as we all know that Trump thinks abortion is murder and that women should starve themselves thin in order to please him and his corporate world..

With sex shaming Wonder Woman we have sex shamed all women.. even way back in the ancient culture of Greece, the philosophers and politicians knew better..

Humanity is slipping back into the tar sands.. we are devolving as our civilization is degenerating into a mediocrity that causes us to become complacently abused.

#noDAPL

 

We have watched the news unfolding on Facebook over Standing Rock and the Water Protesters taking a stand for all of humanity by trying to peacefully protect the drinking water on the Native American reservation. All of the major new’s media such as New York Times and the Globe and Mail are reporting that Obama has stopped big oil from putting the pipeline under the lake; and so we all celebrated the good news thinking it was over and that good won over greed.. yet just now on my Facebook I have posted a live feed video from Lakota’s People’s Law Project informing us past major media that the drilling is still going through. The media and the vets have been used to turn our attention away from DAPL,  so that people would leave the site of the pipeline so that they can use subterfuge to complete the pipeline.

I don’t have to cite facts about leakage of oil and gas as they are all over the internet for you to fact out for yourself; and if you are reading this I am sure you have. I am sure I don’t have to tell you that we have reached the carbon tipping point and that our dependence on fossil fuels has tipped us into the toxic zone. I am sure I don’t have to tell you that the leaks and the spillage alone has smothered life in our world wide oceans killing 2/3 of the world’s ocean life. I am sure I don’t have to tell you that it isn’t just greenery and forests that create and sustain our oxygen supplies but it is also our oceans that give off life sustaining oxygen.. and oil and plastic’s created by fossil fuels are smothering our ocean’s of life sustaining oxygen. I am sure I don’t have to tell you this as even my 9 yo son understands that we cannot breath carbon or drink oil.. I am sure I don’t have to tell you that the Oil and Gas Industry has become so powerful that it can now pay off our government’s, and our law enforcement to work for them to do their bidding rather than to follow the laws that were created to protect and serve all the people.. because even my children understand this.

I know you know that the people who own and run the fossil fuel industry have more than enough money to phase the energy industry into a clean and green energy industry. I bet you know other countries like Greenland and Scotland are pretty much off the fossil fuel grid.. I bet you know that don’t you.. my kids know that.

I bet you have concluded on your own that if big oil wanted to the could switch their investments from oil into wind, sun and water or even thermal energy and they could advise other’s to do so by use of the media to create a clean industry that is both ethical, science based, practical and lucrative. I know you know that. I know that you know that if they wanted to they could create jobs by building factories that make solar cells and wind turbines ..etc.. etc..and they could create jobs installing and upkeeping a clean power grid. You are intelligent, so you are wise to the fact that greed is the Achilles Heel of humanity.. it is greed that retards the human species intellect. It is greed that is our kryptonite, greed is the cancer in the human soul that manifest as cancer in our bodies and it is the greed of a powerful and ruthless few, that will destroy us all, as it is going unchecked.

With the fire power and military or violence on the side of the greedy few, the entire human race faces extinction.

As fossil fuels leak into our drinking water we will be forced to buy drinking water from the greedy few who contaminated our drinking water for a short term gain…and then slowly we will all die from lack of oxygen and clean water..

The question is this ” How do the many regain their power back from the merciless few? How can these people be awakened from their greed and insanity before they destroy life on this planet?”

But maybe, just maybe the human race has reached it’s peak, scientifically speaking we just might be the next species source of power just like the fossil fuels that we consume.. let’s hope we burn cleaner.. I know I am being cryptic .. but you are intelligent you get the point..

If we cannot speak to the powers that hold this horrific power over us; if we cannot reach them and awaken them.. then just maybe we have had our time in the sun..?

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