Archive for June, 2015

Competition is for the weak

 

The reason we compete is to gain the approval of others and to qualify ourselves as better than others.. the truly strong or empowered know they are their own competition. I am not just talking about sports.. I am talking about life. Since writing my blog and website I have had many women assume that I put my topless pictures online and have written about my sexuality simply to get male and media attention. I understand the assumptions and the confusion as many women and men use their sexuality online to compete against others and simply for the sake of attention.. like getting 15 min of fame.. like making stupid people famous.. becoming famous for showing tits and ass.. with no other reason except for the sake of deep rooted insecurities and immaturities. I used my nudity in a very calculated and intellectual way to promote natural sexuality and sexual health… to out sexual repression. Quite frankly when another woman poses herself as my competition online or in my daily life I think it is a ridiculous waste of her time and energy.. if she truly wants to be great she should just be herself.. if she truly wants to be great she should do something for humanity outside of herself.. and I think when other women compete against other women they are comparing themselves..if you are truly an empowered woman you know no one can compare to you..as you are unique.. I truly empowered woman is not a brand she is an icon.

In a competition you compete were your so called competitors are competing .. and you have accepted them as your competition by allowing it and accepting them as such.. the iconic run their own race..and metaphorically speaking; it’s a jump off a very high cliff..and they build their wings the way down… this isn’t a race against any competition.. no one else has racing numbers pinned to them.. running beside them ..with a predetermined start and finish line.. you see; for the iconic the finish line is their last breath.. it’s a risk of falling from grace.. to climb all the way back up to the top with a pack full of lessons.. when they plant that flag.. the flag of ” Fuck you ” fuck you.. to the ordinary.. the daily grind.. fuck you to the I wanna be just like them so I can fit in.. fuck you to coloring in the lines..fuck you to rules..fucking stupid rules that keep you on a track already defined by others.. defined by fear..and fuck you to fear.. NO FEAR!

I am not going to stand up in a line up of bikini clad women..who have stripped all the fat off their bodies to see who can look most like the mold ( white ) by white I mean the white entitled definition of beauty were every single women in a beauty contest has to try to look as European as possible.. break that fucking mold.. why the fuck do you want to look like everyone else? Why the fuck do you want to look like the most polished version of plastic crap? Real empowered women don’t compete against other women..they don’t do fashion shoots all lined up with their asses sticking out.. looking like a dime-a-dozen.. looking like they blend one into the other..” Take your pic..or fuck them all” nothing new here.. nothing different.. nothing exciting.. take a good look then move along and forget about it…nothing to remember here.. just the same old..same old ..same as it always was.. women dumbing themselves down to fit into the box.. to fit the mold of beauty lost..the beauty of imperfections and character.. it’s just plastic perfection and the projection of insecurities of women clawing over each other fake eyelashes and nails.. bleached blond, crunchy.. overly processed hair..

But you did something.. or so you think.. you got a trophy and a plastic crown to go with your plastic perfection.. you showed those other bitches who the best and biggest bitch is.. but you are lost.. lost in a rat-race, circle of competition.. lost your true self or any real message.. lost yourself in comparing apples to oranges.. trying to be one.. when you were a peach… but peaches are not trendy right now.. so you had to make yourself into what you are not… and so you blend right in.. all the magic in you lost for nothing… and what you won was the same thing the next girl will win..and you will blend into the pictures on the wall of tinsel fame..that means nothing at all..

It’s degrading.. it’s downgrading … it’s a chipping away of the perfectly/imperfect Goddess that you are..

To take this post in another direction.. I have recently been reading post on The Globe and Mail that feminists are starting to wear granny panties vs thong panties and they are not shaving their legs or arm pits..seems to me that feminist are also being placed into a box by media… it is to say that you have to follow this look of going against what is seen as typical beauty to be a feminist..as if being a feminist means being ugly .. like would you stop showering if it labeled you as a feminist by the media and the world? It is to say that you have to look like this mold or version of a feminist to be taken seriously in the world as a feminist.. well fuck that shit.. A feminist is who the fuck she wants to be.. a feminist is herself..

So write your own story.. create your own art..stop stealing from others.. be original..be an icon.. break the mold..color outside of the lines..wear your freckles with pride.. rock your curves.. be proud of your sexuality.. your own body.. take a leap of faith.. get off the beaten path.. free yourself of mediocrity..don’t be a carbon copy.

http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000576933/The-Goddess-an-Expression-of-the-Divine-Feminine.aspx link to my book

Comparison is the thief of joy

Or it is an examination of reality..and reality bites.

” Be like water.. flow” Or ” Only dead fish float”

Success .. how do you define success? Is it to rise above others.. to stand out from the crowd by having more than what others have..be it fame or money? I define success as helping others rise.. this is my calling and this is me being truly myself. I have seen the inequalities by comparison my entire life.. from a small child I could see the entitlement of men over women..and racists attitudes and beliefs in our cultures.. I could see from the time my feet hit the earth.. how religion and other organizations brainwashed society into these unequal patterns ..that we act out daily against one another.. and so I rage against the machine.. I rage against the bullshit.. break out of the box and raise my fist against it..and I expose it..I write about it.. to help society rise.

Yes comparison is the thief of joy.. but it is those who place the comparisons that are the true thieves of equality.. they are the black magicians.. the wolves in sheep’s clothing… the lions that seem to be tamed.. the capitalist that calls himself a philanthropist.. is really the wolf hunting the sheep.. in the camouflage of the sheep’s skin.. of the last one he ran through with his hidden agenda.. ” Welcome to the Jungle it gets worse here everyday, ya learn to live like an animal, in the Jungle were we play, if you got a hunger for what you see, you will take it eventually, you can have anything you want but you better not take it from me ” Guns N’ Roses mentality..but the truth will set you free.

If we stop comparing.. we will become food for those who eat people’s faces off.. the lion that you thought you had tamed.. but you loved the lion..you fed the lion.. you even coddled the lion.. and the lion was like a child to you..but when you were alone with the lion.. were no one could see.. the true nature of the lion came out to play..and the lion ate your face off.. this is the nature of the beast.. the nature of greed for those who define their successes as having others bones beneath their feet… it is in the lion’s and the wolves nature to feed.. because this is the Jungle.. and the laws of nature apply.. so you better get wise.. you better watch them for what they do..not for who they say they are.. you better fucking compare sheep to lions.. wolves to rabbits.. victimizers to victims so that you be neither .. these are street smarts .. required by those born into the Jungle.. were you learn to run before you walk.. you learn to get the fuck outta there when the air gets heavy and hot.. you trust your instincts..when the hair raises on the back of your neck you know your being hunted.. you know your being stalked.. to not become the cruel flesh eater.. you don’t join in the feeding frenzy.. you don’t move with the pack.. you become the lone wolf.. the one that goes against the nature of the beast.. to not become the victim you get wise to your own nature.. your own inner beast is the one you tame.. not the beasts outside of yourself.. you don’t walk away you run.. you get gone when the air gets think with blood lust.. this is the wisdom of the lone wolf..of the lion that has truly become the King of the Jungle.. he/she moves at their own pace.

But if women stop comparing inequalities of the 77 cent dollar compared to %100 male dollar the beast will continue to feed on the flesh of the weak that choose to go belly up and float.. if African American’s don’t compare white justice to true justice .. justice will never be manifest.. it will stay The Jungle..and the saints and angels will always be portrayed with white skin..and those of color will remain less than.. this is reality and it bites.. it bites down hard with the intention of tearing flesh down to bone.

So joy walks hand in hand with sorrow.. so we can know joy by comparison towards the depths of deep sadness.. this births wisdom.. because in The Jungle only the prey go belly up.

” In The Jungle, Welcome to the Jungle, watch it bring you to your..It’s gonna bring ya down – HA!”

Be Love

 

I asked the moon and the stars.. in my dreams.. “How do I manifest love when no one has loved me like I need to be loved?”

They said to me..in my heart..through my imagination .. they said to me ” Be the love you hope to see.”

They said it to me in a song..brought down to me through stardust and moonbeams..

They said to me.. ” Just be sweetly and quietly the love you wish to see.”

And so cried tears of diamonds.. like the wishing stars I wish for love upon.. they fell upon the Earth to grow like mighty oaks..

No one needs to know.. the magic secrets here.. so mysterious.. like the dark velvet night..and the diamond stars that speak to my heart..

Just be love..

Just be love..

In love

 

I didn’t expect it to happen.. I don’t know exactly what happened.. I thought you would just be like the rest of them.. just another guy but you have something so special inside.

It was like an inner, tiny, micro explosion when your eyes locked with mine.. all of the walls that I carefully kept up..that I had built with fear and apprehension.. fell to dust… when your soul met mine.

And now I am confused..so powerful and supernatural ..so transcendental is this transformation of my heart from caterpillar to butterfly.. that I feel so humble as the holy light of dawn rushes in were only darkness once lived.. the melancholy turned to bliss..but a bliss that is so fragile.. leaving me weak and vulnerable.. such is the love of words not yet spoken.. held tenderly in the heart so fearful of once again being broken.. how you have me under your spell.. that I can not believe that you could also love me like this? Could you? Could you love as the moon loves the sun’s first morning kiss?

Could you love in the dreamy dream of the moonstruck madness of love not yet spoken of.. not yet spoken of between me and you.. as a candle freshly lit.. the flame yet to breath in the reality of its own existence.. the miracle of what it is just becoming.. a light to light the world and many candles yet not knowing the joy.. the joy of you ..of your eyes.. the light of your soul that I see dance beneath your diamond irises .. how could you be so beautiful? Could you love my soul as I love yours? Oh how we have lived such parallel lives.. how we walked the same roads and talked to the same people.. never to meet but suddenly to meet like this.. how could you love me as I love you like the beat of my own heart?..  others will divide us.. even though our souls are of the same light.. we are kindred in spirit .. we beat with the same heart..but our lives are so different.. they will tear us apart. But even so.. I love you anyway.. for your love has opened my heart.. your love has set me free.. your love has softened me.. from the brutal cold hearts; the mean and the cruel.. you have given me back wonder and innocence.. wings to fly.. you have unlocked the prison that they trapped me in with their cruelties .. you are poetry..the painter of my soul…you have given my wounds sweetness and balm.. you healed me instead of injuring me.. you my love pulled arrows from the breast of the swan.. you are my song.. music and delight.. you are a pleasure just to behold in the sun’s golden light.. I see your soul glitter through your eyes.. your voice like the warm summer breeze.. sounds so soft as madrigal poems.

But I know this.. meeting you has made my heart so delicate.. like rose petals and gossamer wings… like silken threads of spider’s webs.. my heart it is so sensitive… and so I weep of words I dare not speak should you not feel the same for me..should I break the spell of love so sentimental that the luxuriousness will be lost by your denial..and so I write here.. my heart sequestered .. I hide away in this secret place least the fairy dust should settle.. the fall to earth would be more than I can take..for my heart has already been shattered, I know I would break.

Could you love like this too? Could you love me like such a childish fool? Of all the things I will dare to do.. of all the dangers that I willingly face.. I cannot tell you to your face.. that I love you..

Yes there is love at first glance.. you are the one who showed me that.

Whores want ATTENTION!

Or she isn’t doing it for attention.. you are a fucking asshole.. a misogynistic woman hating; chauvinist pig.. and you hate her because you can’t have her.. because she knows you are a misogynist, woman hating pig..and she wouldn’t let you touch her with another woman’s vagina..or another man’s dick..

She is pretty you are a piece of crap.. she isn’t a whore.. whore is a subjective term used by men like you.. and so what if she wants attention; it’s normal to want attention from the opposite sex when your looking for a mate, for both men and women. .. it’s her body to do with what she wants.. go fuck yourself.

The END..

JUST DO IT.

This is for all the men that don’t do it..but think they can pick apart women’s bodies that do .. do it!.. Just shut the fuck up!

Unless you are willing to suit up and chalk up.. lift some heavy shit up.. know what the fuck real heavy metal is; just shut the fuck up or.. JUST DO IT!

If your diet consists of pub food, cigarettes and booze.. shut the fuck up.. butt out.. turn the shot class upside down..push your flabby ass away from the table.. JUST DO IT!

You don’t get to have an opinion on if whether or not a woman’s muscles are too big or too small.. if your not willing to work yours as well.. if you are too lazy to get your fat ass up off the couch or the pub stool.. you need to top running your fucking mouth.

Your just pissed because we are working circles around you.. making you look bad to you..and you know you don’t stand a fucking chance with a woman who treats herself and her body like the temple it is..because she knows she is GODDESS..and you treat your body like a fucking garbage can.. and so you attempt to break her down to your level of crap..with your trash talking bullshit.. mouth that runs faster than you can walk.. let alone run.. you can’t run.. you can’t do shit so you need to try to make a woman that lifts feel like shit..because you feel like shit.. you know you are not at her speed.. you can’t keep the fuck up.. calling them bitches because you’r a little bitch boy .. JUST DO IT and get off your high horse .. get on the track.. get set up to the rack and squat.. JUST DO IT or shut the fuck up!

You bitch talk about the woman who has had children; that her tummy isn’t toned or six packed while she has birthed .. she has wept..she sweats..she lifts and she grinds.. she has character behind her lines.. but you are flabby because your lazy.. your gut is from beer and potato ships..and you think you can be critical about how imperfect you think she is.. about her strength..her motherhood.. her endurance and tenacity .. while you; little bitch boy got your huge gut from hitting the fridge..not from giving birth to wonderful kids.. but even still she is way more than you could ever hope to become.. and that is why you need to run her down.. while she laps your ass again and again.. at the track were you are never found.. she leaves you slammed down on the iron..she purges you in the sweat she leaves splattered on the floor..and you think you have the right to be a hypocrite.. an idiot.. take a good look in the mirror.. shut your mouth.. or JUST DO IT!

DO YOU EVEN LIFT.. past the greasy food you put up to your evil lips? Ya we know you don’t.. GIRLS WHO LIFT.. we know you don’t!.. But you look at us like a KFC value meal.. lips, hips and tits.. why don’t you just keep stuffing it in your greasy face; shut the fuck up or JUST DO IT!

You bastards are our motivation.. we are Angel and Devils.. GODDESSES OF THE GYM.. you will find the devil in her eyes if you cross that fucking line.. don’t you dare stare at her like she is meat for you to eat.. or she will knock you off your fucking feet..

Your talk is cheap.. lets see you move those feet and shift your ass… JUST DO IT or move it the fuck out of our way our reps are our play.

What I think about Suicide

I believe the soul cannot die or be destroyed because it’s energy and scientifically speaking .. energy cannot be created or destroyed .. so truthfully there isn’t life or death when were are measuring it be energy.. there is only life and death of the flesh. I think or believe the reasons that we ( as spirits or energy ) manifest into the flesh is to temper or perfect the energy or spirit.. and the spirit or energy of course belongs to it’s self or the source of all creation or energy.. so life and lifetimes are lessons towards the tempering of source energy.. so when we end our own lives.. I believe we are reincarnated right back to were we cut our lives short..because the soul or the energy hasn’t upgraded to the next level of it’s perfection or wisdom.

Suicides don’t go to hell but they come back to experience the hell that they tried to escape.. until they master that hell..and turn lead into gold.

We can look at it like a video game..a metaphor.. when you loose your life on the game .. you start with your new life on the level you finished your last.

I think the Universe or Energy.. directly lines up the players of the last game.. the stage.. circumstances and characters so that the destiny or fate can be played out; So your right back were you started.. the soul or source will not be satisfied until you learn to master the hand you are dealt ..

I think that when your energy or the source energy has played out the experiences of being human .. that the human experience will no longer be needed..and the slate will be wiped clean.. or the game board will be recycled into a new game or species .. I also think that there have been many humans that graduated the human experience before the rest of us.. these are the masters.. the mystics, gurus, prophets and demigods .. or gods.

Our greatest trump in the human experience is the mind.. because it’s only through self mastery that we can create like gods.. the experience that we are living.. it is only though self mastery that we can use genius to beat the game with a shitty hand.. most of us who have a shitty hand, have shitty people in our lives and shitty situations.. but if you can soar above your own story and see the checkered board on which you are a pawn.. you can learn to checkmate Kings and Queens..because once you know you are being played.. you can play through the game because the rules of the game will become a mute point..

So don’t give up.. just wake up and become aware of your own energy.

What I think about God

We are Gods.. we create this reality.. God is in words and in forms or symbols that we create because we are the Gods creating Gods outside of ourselves.. once humanity realizes that we are the Gods, that we create, then we can move forward towards our true evolution..because once we all accept this as fact and accept the sciences .. we will create a reality that is conscious.. but because most of the human race lives by superstition we remain unconscious towards our own divine nature.. ( you know it’s wisdom because it’s damn simple )

Q. ” Why does the cage bird sing?”

A. ” Because it is in it’s nature to sing.. when the bird stops singing it’s dead ”

The riddle or metaphor.. Humanity is killing it’s self by denying it’s own true nature through religious repression.. humanities repressed sexual nature turns to wars inside the subconscious and therefore manifests outside of the individual consciousness towards the wars of nations and the sexes.

If the answer to humanities problems or lack of evolution is continually denied..it will eventually lead to us destroying our own species … the answer is to not deny our own nature or biology .. this creates harmony and life vs death from lack of thriving due to repression..

See how simplistic wisdom is…

http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000576933/The-Goddess-an-Expression-of-the-Divine-Feminine.aspx  paste and copy this link to find my book 

Break Through

He kept asking me ” If you could have one break through in your life right now what would it be?”

I realize now he is the one who needs to break through his own fears.. funny how projection works.. funny how he was afraid to show me his soul while I was having the courage to offer him my heart and soul wide open..

I don’t need seminars to tell me how to be brave.. I just jump in feet first.. just like I am the first one in the lake..the first one to swim in freezing cold spring waters while other’s my age watch amazed..

They need the to ” Break on through to the other side ”

They have organizations that profess to be for diversity .. but they exclude me due to their prejudice and fears.. they claim to be compassionate and philanthropist.. while in private messages and behind closed doors they are cruel.

They use the press to promote their fake spiritual trends and organizations.. the press it’s self being plastic as hell.. just like them.

They say they support the Goddess Movement holding full moon circles while being to fearful .. terrified of women’s sexuality.. their spirituality watered down..nothing real here.. nothing but pasteurized and purified ..bullshit spirituality.. the sacred made profane by washing it out ..to make it safe for even the fake and flaky .. there is no medicine here.. no Priestesses .. no Goddesses.. just a bunch of women playing it safe.. not realizing that being called a cunt and whore .. were actually complements to the Goddess.. many 1000s of years ago.. the cunt the yoni.. the sacred whore the bridge to heaven.. the passage of the initiation .. the way to life..

They all just skim the surface.. too terrified to really touch the cloak of the divine.. to lift the veil ..to open Pandora’s BOX.. ( they will not understand that metaphor )

They search for the magic in safe and structured places.. because they lack in faith and character..to be about it..to really be the change..

They will not go deeply into the darkest uncharted waters of the soul.. they will not go because others will not go with them.. to find the pearls of wisdom..

The wisdom isn’t found walking the path that others follow.. ( how they love to follow the easy path ).. the wisdom is found were Angels fear to tread.. were only GODS go..

My break through is this… I have the pearl..

And sometimes it is best not to ” Cast your pearls upon swine ”

So let them have their pretty surface organizations.. let them post what they wish they had the courage to do..

And I will keep doing it.. while they gather in groups of spiritual darkness…being to fearful to go deep to find the light within the dark night of the soul..

It’s the only way to find the treasure..to not just say you are about it..but to be it..

With that I hold the Golden Laurel..

Irrelevant

 

I had a conversation just now with a younger woman from my gym who goes topless at a local beach. I went topless with her last summer when Lori Welbourne was pretending to give a shit about the issue to get on the Ellen Degeneres Show.. to recap Lori found out about my book and website through Facebook.. used the issue of women’s sexual repression and many of my ideas to float her own show boat. It didn’t work out for her because she is an asshole ..she couldn’t handle the heat..and a lot of the stuff she did was intended to secretly make a mockery of me so that she could gain favor in our local community clicks..” well Karma is only a bitch if you are Lori..” but anyway Lori promoted this younger woman on her Facebook.. me still thinking Lori was my friend..well I showed up and actually went topless with this girl.. while Lori was missing in action ( Typical of people in Kelowna.. not practicing what they post ) bullshitters.

But the young woman showed me a picture of herself topless on the same beach.. with her graduation cap on.. when I was putting my make up on in the gym change room. I told  her she was brave.. she told me how passionate she felt about women’s topless rights..then we started to talk about my book.. basically her message to me was that my book was irrelevant to intellectual circles and women’s advocate groups because it’s just me, my story.. my image as seven different Goddess archetypes .. my perspective was a mute point because it wasn’t based on hard core data or I didn’t cite my research in the book..but she was relevant because she just graded with a degree and she was on the beach not looking for attention but making ground in Kelowna.

I tried to tell her my book isn’t just for intellectuals ..but for every woman and that every woman’s story is relevant just based on their experience and perspective.. like the micro in the macro.. I tried to explain the archetypes because she wasn’t aware of them. I tied to explain the prejudice in our local arts community due to patrons of the arts being very religions and conservative. Tried to explain to her that my book was much bigger than just a beach.. that putting my website out to the whole world was meant to cover much more ground than just a small unknown beach.. not that what she was doing was irrelevant at all..

I tried to explain world wide religious repression of women’s sexuality, including in our culture, that has caused the repression of my work and my personal sexuality due to my work in our community..but she wanted data.. just like a good student that just graded would.. I tried to explain to her reality vs just hard, cold data and stats.. and then I tried to explain to her that even if a woman was going topless on a beach for attention it doesn’t matter because lots of men go topless for sexual attention.

I tried to explain to her about artistic expression and how that it is just as intellectual as data..if not more so because you have to use your own mind and perspective to appreciate art and literature ..it’s not just data it’s painting with words and images.. but she clearly didn’t understand that.

She didn’t understand what it’s like to put it out there on a larger scale.. what it’s like not to have a boyfriend to sit with me topless on a beach..as I am topless on the web without male protection.. and she didn’t understand that the cops on the beach in the background of her cell phone pic; were actually protecting her and the other woman that were going topless on the beach.. I don’t have that protection.. this is the hard cold reality of a woman expressing her sexuality .. it’s not all hard cold data and studies.. this is the real deal.. a real woman’s story and I think every woman has or will go through the shit I write about to some degree or another.. just for looking sexy or being a sexual being on her own terms or on male patriarchal sexual control forms, like playboy..

I don’t think my story; writing or work..is irrelevant.. just as I think every woman’s story is relevant.. including hers.. I truly hope she totally wins that beach over for all women who want to practice their right to be topless were men can be topless..as I hope for my success as well..to be found and picked up by a publishing house or some big time celeb who will help me fly this dream for the sake of all women..

As for Lori.. it’s a damn shame that other women have to attempt to build a false dream on the real dreams of other women.. that is sad..very sad.. women must stop the competition for a true sisterhood and or Goddess Movement to emerge from the ashes of a Patriarchy we wish to burn down to the nasty roots it sprung from.

http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000576933/The-Goddess-an-Expression-of-the-Divine-Feminine.aspx  find my book on this link

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